Being a Good Friend

So the past couple of weeks have really opened my eyes to all the "friendships" I have created here in NYC. I think I was under the grand illusion that these people that I would do anything for would equally do anything for me. However, I'm slowly learning that perhaps I consider myself to be good friends with someone before we actually are. I think is the same problem that I've been having with my relationships. I either want to go to fast or take it to the friendzone waiting too long. Yet, that post is for another time entirely. Maybe after I've had a glass of wine...or a bottle.

No this post is not for relationships, such as boyfriend boyfriend, but for relationships with friends. In the past week I've realized that I have really three great friends out here in the city, that although I don't think they would do ANYTHING for me I believe that would do most anything, and at the very least have my back if needed. Then after that I would say that I have about six or seven really close friends that I talk to on a daily basis that I would say I would do anything for but because the friendship is newish I don't know if that would be returned. After that I think the there are some people who I used to consider really really close friends that have drifted away for some reason or another and now things are uncomfortable even if we say we are fine. I don't know if its me, or them, or just that feelings have been hurt and that time is just going to have to heal those wounds.

All in all I think this has been a real life lesson for me. Not to jump into a friendship too fast, don't just make this connection that on the surface looks amazing but when you get down to it wasn't really anything and hurts even more because of it. Being a good friend means being able to put in the time and effort a relationship needs in order to continue and grow. I'm guilty of not putting in some of that time and effort but I'm also equally guilty of putting in too much. I guess we'll just see if I can find the balance.